Sweet Nothings
by elphaba's-wicked-heir
Summary: A compilation of scenes between Edward and Harry. Some are sweet. Some are bitter. And the rest are just plain perverted.


**Author's Notes:** Hey there, reader! So this little piece of work was done by one of my friends back in high school with a little editing from me. She asked (or rather, **blackmailed T_T) **me into posting this story and sharing this with you! So yeah. We hope you'll have fun reading this as much as we did writing it.

Please Read and Review!

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing. Really. Nothing. The characters belong to writers J.K. Rowling and Stephanie Meyer. The plot is my friend's.

**Summary: **A compilation of scenes between Edward and Harry. Some are sweet. Some are bitter. And the rest are just plain perverted.

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SWEET NOTHINGS

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Edward and Harry were in the school library, studying for their math test. Harry noticed that Edward was staring at him for three minutes, straight.

**H **(waving a hand over Edward's face): Hey, you zoned out on me.

**E:** (no response; still staring)

**H** (acts as if on the phone): Hello? Earth to Edward? Hello?

**Librarian: **SHHH!

**H:** Sorry. (to Edward) What is wrong with you? (pinches Edward's arm)

**E **(rubbing his palm over the area Harry pinched): Ow! That hurts, dude!

**H:** Hey! You're the one who sat there, staring at me for about three minutes already!

**L:** SHHH!

**H & E: **Sorry.

**H:** Well?

**E:** Well?

**H:** Quit staring at me! If you fall in love with me with all of your staring, I swear I'll laugh at you.

**E** (moves his chair closer to Harry): Well, you can start laughing now.

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**H: **We're best friends right?

**E: **Yeah. Ever since forever.

**H: **Will you be honest with me?

**E: **You know I will. Where is this conversation headed?

**H: **Well, is there someone you like? (blushes) Well, of course, this is just something—

**E: **(laughs)No one.

**H: **No one, huh? (laughs nervously)

**E: **Yeah. Because I love someone.

**H: **Oh. Right. (shifts uncomfortably in his seat)

**E: **…

**H: **Well, whoever that maybe, that someone is really lucky.

**E: **Well, he doesn't know it yet.

**H: **Oh, ri—. Did you say, he?

**E: **That's right. (hesitantly) He's just so beautiful and kind-hearted and I loved him ever since I met him.

**H **(voice cracks):Yeah, I think he's wonderful. (clears his throat) So, umm, since we're best friends, I want to meet him.

**E** (hesitantly): But—

**H: **You have his number, right? Just call him.

**E** (blushing): I don't know if he'll answer.

**H: **Oh, for heaven's sake. Just do it. (looks at him with puppy dog eyes) For me?

**E: **Oh, okay. If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't do this. At all. (pulls out phone and starts dialing)

**H: **Good. (phone rings) Wait, someone is calling me. (gets phone and answers without looking) Hello?

**E:** I love you.

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**E: **I'm going to tell you something. But first, you'll have to promise me you'll remember every single word I'll say.

**H: **(who had been crushing on Edward for the longest time) Yeah. Sure.

**E:** (takes a deep breath then kneels on one knee) I love you. I've always did. You're everything I need. I just didn't show it because I'm afraid you don't feel the same way, too. But now, I won't be scared of loving you. You're the best thing that ever happened to me.

**H:** (blushes) Wow!

**E: **Did you get all of that? Have you memorized it? (stands up)

**H: **Yes, every line is etched forever in my mind. I won't forget even a single word. Oh, Edward, I lov—

**E: **Good. Could you tell that to Bella? Thanks. (walks away)

**H: **(speechless)

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**E:** Hey there pretty.

**H:** (bats eyelashes at him) Hello.

**E:** I was just wondering if you're aware that you're like my lice?

**H:** What! (punches him in the gut, then in the face and kicks him hard) Asshole. (walks away)

**E:** Don't you want to hear the punch line?

**H:** (continues walking)

**E:** (shouts) Because I can't get you out of my head!

**H:** (comes back and punches Edward more)

THE NEXT DAY…

**E**: Hey.

**H: **Haven't you had enough yesterday? (growls)

**E **(wincing)**: **Wait! Here me out first.

**H **(glares but says nothing)

**E: **I think you're the nicest piece of shit around here.

**H: **No you don't. (punches Edward in the face and walks away)

**E: **Hey! This one's better than the louse-thing! (runs to Harry, grabs his arm and turns Harry towards him)

**H:** It better. (pulls his fist back and glowers at Edward)

**E: **You're shit because I would never play with you. Or your feelings.

**H: **(smiles) You better run now. Because once I catch you, I'll be beating the shit out of you!

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**E:** (walks by Harry then stops in front of him)

**H:** (ignore)

**E:** Do you believe in love at first sight?

**H:** (looks at him momentarily then ignores him)

**E: **So, do you? Or do you want me to walk by again?

**H:** Yeah, but this time, don't stop. (walks way)

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**E:** Hey, gorgeous.

**H:** Hey.

**E:** Beauty must run in your family.

**H:** (stares at him) …

**E: **Well?

**H:** It obviously doesn't run in yours. (walks away)

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**E: **(while in the line in a grocery store): Hey.

**H:** (ignore)

**E:** (taps the back of the black-haired, green-eyed, gorgeous stranger he wants to take home)

**H:** (irritated) What?

**E:** Nothing. Just wanna ask you a question. (shrugs)

**H:** Make it fast. (rolls eyes)

**E:** Are you akin to a fridge?

**H:** …

?

What?

**E:** Are you related to a fridge?

**H:** Hell no! Why do you ask?

**E:** (twitches eyebrows repeatedly) Because, you make me hard. (winks)

**H:** (punches Edward in the groin)

**E:** (howls in pain)

**H:** Seems to me you're not hard enough. (walks away)

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Author's Notes: So there! I know it sucks. And maybe it's not as funny as I'd like it to be, but… Anyway, what did you think? Was it utter crap and do you wanna curse me into oblivion for wasting your time? Or was it sweet and cute and funny that you'd add me as your Favorite Author (though it was my friend's HIHIHI) and read my other stories? I wanna hear more from you!

Please Review and Recommend!

Love!

-elphaba's wicked heir! :)


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